Quiet
by sparra-music
Summary: When Danny gets "quiet", Steve rants.
1. Quiet

**AN:**

I was just contemplating the characters while trying to finish up Ass-Grabbing this morning, when this facet of Danny's character popped into my head. And once I started writing about it... it just kind of took over into its own little oneshot.

**Disclaimer:** They're still not mine. But if anyone knows where to send a résumé to apply for a job as one of CBS's scriptwriters... please let me know.

**Warning:** some very bad language... I feel like I should be washing my mouth out with soap this week.

_**Quiet**_

"Something's wrong with Danny." Steve stated firmly as his partner closed his office door. "I wanna know why he's been so quiet the last week."

"Quiet?" Kono yelped, turning from the smart board and looking carefully at her boss, checking his pupils and wondering if maybe he'd managed to concuss himself this morning without them knowing about it.

"We talking about the same Danny?" Chin's tone was teasing, but McGarrett remained serious.

"Yeah, brah." The crease between his eyes deepened further.

"But boss, Danny hasn't shut up all week!" Kono exclaimed. "If anything, he's been even louder than usual; I actually heard him before you even got through the doors yesterday morning!"

Steve sighed, running his fingers through his hair. "But he hasn't been _**saying **_anything,"

Chin read the concern in Steve's eyes. As much as he might want the whole thing to be the SEAL's sick idea of a joke, it wasn't. Letting his tone indicate his willingness to help McGarrett, he said, "Sorry man. Not following you."

Steve waved his hands in the air in frustration, and the move was so _Danny_, that Chin nearly snorted in inappropriate laughter. Nearly.

"Have you heard the things coming out of him this week? Pineapple on pizza is sacrilege! Ties are professional dress attire, not a garrote in disguise for bad guys to use! Hawaii is too hot! Your driving is way too fast, way too reckless, way too out-of control!"

Chin still wasn't too sure where this was going. He glanced at his cousin. Kono was still looking at their boss as if assessing him for signs of TBI. So Chin decided to state the obvious.

"It's nothing he hasn't said a dozen times before."

"Exactly!" Steve nearly thundered.

_Oh, shit,_ thought Chin. _He thinks I got it... but now I'm twice as confused._

Some of the confusion must have snuck past his Zen mask and onto his face, because Steve rubbed his face and then continued.

"He's said it all before. Dozens of times- hell, hundreds of times, even. But never with this much ferocity, this much crazy damn intensity. As Kono put it, the volume is all the way up. But it's more than that; it's not just that he's repeating the same old stuff and getting way more ticked off about it than he ever has before, it's that there's nothing _**new**_.

"There's _**always**_ something new for Danny to bitch about. We might have covered sports so many times that we can predict each other's argument for the superiority of baseball or football, but I let him bring it up again because then we get to discuss _**specific players'**_ faults. He might have bawled me out about correct police procedure a million times, but it's always specific. It's always what I did wrong _**this time**_, not just that I'm screwing up _**in general**_and have no restraint. We drive down a street we've driven down a hundred times before, a sign in a restaurant window catches his eye, and he'll go off on the _**specific food**_ being advertised.

"And the few things he does repeat- the ties and pizza and driving... usually they're _**banter**_. We know we don't agree, and we've kind of agreed to disagree, and it's just like me razzing Mary about cleaning her apartment, or something. But this week, Danny's been screaming, actually _**screaming**_, dammit, not just raising his voice, and there's venom there. And he's not looking at me. He always looks at me when he rants, so that he can see my reaction and put on that gloating smile when he gets under my skin.

"And to top it all off, he's not waving his hands as much. He keeps clenching them in his lap. And it reminds me of the time when Rachel tried to get his custody rights revoked. Because first he was glaring at his phone while he texted, and then he got really loud while ranting about how tiny the buttons were on his cell phone and how much texting sucks, and then he got quiet and clenched his fists around it until I thought he was going to _**crush**_ the thing with his _**hands**_, and then he threw it and _**screamed**_ a few more things while_** not**_ looking at me, and then he crossed his arms and got _**really**_ quiet... The only other time he's ever been that _**quiet **_was after Matt left. It was like," Steve licked his lips, searching for a way to make this understandable. "Like he couldn't stand to talk about it. He wanted to talk, needed that verbal pressure valve or something, but just couldn't stand to talk about _**it**_. It hurt too much, or it pissed him off too much, or both. Danny, who has words for everything, usually twenty-seven where three would be fine, can't express himself verbally when he gets really, really angry.

"And this week, it's been like that _**all the damn time**_. Like he's in _**pain**_, and trying to distract himself by bitching about things that don't really matter. Only he's so focused on whatever _**awful shit**_ is going on that he can't even come up with anything new to rant about. So he falls back on the ones that he's done so many times, he can rant about them in his sleep, only they're not enough to distract him. So his hands clench more, and the anger and the pain tighten his muscles until the veins pop out in his arms and his neck and he's sitting so _**rigidly**_ that looking at _**him**_ makes _**my**_ shoulders ache.

"So we _**have**_ to figure out what the hell is going on," concluded Steve, his voice going hollow, "because some shit must be seriously FUBAR for him to be getting so quiet."

"Okay, brah," Chin breathed, somewhat in shock over Steve's verbal torrent. Mostly because of what he'd just said, but there was a fair bit of surprise in that Steve had used up a week's amount of words in one go. "We'll figure it out."

"We might not have to," said Kono quietly, pointing past Steve to where Danny was standing, almost slumping, in his office door.

When he remained there, a thunderstruck look on his face and his body apparently boneless, the other three went to him.

"You okay, brah?" Kono asked.

Danny shook his head slightly and finally shut his mouth. "Yeah, I guess." He rubbed his face. "I came to see what could possibly send _**Steve**_into a _**Jersey rant**_..."

"I do _**not **_rant."

A chuckle escaped Kono at the denial. "You just did, boss."

Steve shot a glare her way, stifling the rookie instantly. But his eyes softened when they landed on his partner again. "I was worried about you."

"Yeah, I got that."

Steve crossed his arms across his chest. "So are you gonna come clean, or do I need to misuse government resources by assigning my team to discover what's wrong with you by any means necessary?"

Danny sighed deeply, and looked down at the floor. When he spoke, there was so much pain in his voice, three hearts broke on the first word. And then broke again, and again, and again, and again.

"Rachel... " Danny swallowed convulsively, "Rachel wants... to _**send **_Gracie..." (the lump in his throat was choking him) "to send _**Gracie**_..." (making it damn difficult to breathe) "to fucking _**finishing school**_..." (_I'm not gonna cry in front of my partner)_ "in _**England**_." _Oh, __**hell**__. _The tears made twin tracks down Danny's cheeks as he did his best to suppress them.

There was silence in the room. Tears sprang into Kono's eyes as she wrapped her arms around Danny and rubbed his back. Chin swallowed, and tried to think what he could possibly say to that.

"Over her dead body," growled McGarrett through a mask of stone. Then he turned with military precision and began to stride for the door. "I think it's time I had a _**talk **_with Rachel."


	2. Intermission

A few seconds after the doors shut behind Steve, Kono's face fell as she reconsidered what Steve had just said. Looking at Chin (over Danny's shoulder) she murmured, "You don't think he'd really..."

_Shit, I hope not. No, McGarrett knows better than that. But then, I never thought he'd dangle a suspect off a building, either. _Chin shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

"He would never actually kill someone just to get his point across." Danny said quietly, wiping his eyes and taking a step back from Kono. "He knows the Governor's immunity isn't likely to extend to murder." He took a step back into his office, looking at the desk, where his cell phone lay. "But I wouldn't put it past him to drag out the shark cage again."

"You gonna call Rachel?"

Danny turned back to Chin, his decision made. "And tell her to put on a swimsuit?" He lowered his head, knowing it was vindictive and cruel, _but she deserves what she gets. This time, I hope Steve scares her out of her wits. She's seen charming. Now she can see the fearsome side. 'Cause it's not just my heart she ripped out and stomped on this time. _He looked at people standing in front of him- his _**ohana**_- and shook his head."No, I'm not."


	3. Loud

Oy Vey! All ya'll are viciously insatiable! I hope you all enjoy__the _**second chapter**_ of this _**one-shot**_.

But you can't read it unless you already reviewed.

**SERIOUSLY.**

Because this story is only for the reviewers. The ones who said, "More, more, more! I want MORE!" The ones who said, "Bring it on!" For walk74, who ranted, " Good Lord above! You cannot leave it like that!"

.

.

.

_**LOUD**_

Steve stabbed the buttons as he punched Grace's birthday into the code box. His fingers tapped the wheel of the car exactly three times as he considered ramming the gates with his Silverado if Rachel had, by some miracle finally listened to Danny and changed the code. _You are not here for property damage. Gracie would not like it if you wrecked her house_, he told himself.

A voice that sounded suspiciously like his partner's sounded off next. _Why must you always go running in recklessly without thinking, Steven? You need to stop and think things through! Wait for backup!_

Steve's hands clenched around the wheel. _Today, I'm the backup. Danno's backup_. Then the gates started to open.

He drove up in front of the door and managed to keep from bashing it with his fists and yelling. As he knocked sedately, Steve thought_, I'll only bang on it if she doesn't answer. And if she still doesn't answer, I'll kick it down, find her, and tell her next time she shouldn't make me wait._

Steve didn't realize his face had gone over to what Danny called his "evil genius smirk" until he saw Rachel's maid open the door and cringe.

_Good,_ he thought ruthlessly. "I need to speak with Rachel." _I hope she warns Rachel and gets her intimidated for a warm-up._

The maid led him into what Rachel had referred to as "the drawing room" the last time he was here, although Steve still couldn't see why it would have such a name. As she left to get Rachel, Steve took a few seconds to plan his attack.

"You wanted to see me, Commander McGarrett?"

"Yes." The "stone-faced SEAL" was back.

Rachel didn't exactly gasp at Steve's manner, but her breath did catch slightly. "Is Danny hurt?"

Change of plans. "Yes." Steve nodded. "Yes, he is hurt, Rachel, and it's all your doing."

"What?" Rachel exclaimed, offended. "I would never hurt Danny."

"That," replied Steve calmly, "is one of the biggest lies I have ever heard."

"How dare you! How dare you insult me like that!"

"It is not," Steve took a step towards her, "an insult." Another step. "It is," another step, "the absolute," another step, "incontrovertible," another step, "unforgivable," he stepped into her personal space, "truth." As Rachel backed all the way to the wall before the look of anger on Steve's face, he followed.

And with every step he took toward her, Rachel felt her loom over her more. And with each step, his voice got just a titch softer and harder. "You have been ripping Danny's good heart out of his chest and shredding it into tiny bits for years. First, you divorced him. If you don't think that hurt him, you're certifiably insane." (Rachel was getting quite frightened by the malevolence his subdued, barely audible voice was projecting down on her.) "Then you took the most precious thing in his life- his daughter- away from him. He moved halfway around the world to spend whatever scraps of time you would allow him with her. When you threatened to take his custody rights away because he was too dangerous to be around, the pain ripped him in two. And now you're trying to do it again, but this time you're not just hurting him; you're hurting her, too."

"I am not!" Rachel protested. "I would never hurt Grace! And sending her to a private finishing school is a great opportunity, not some kind of torture like you and Danny make it out to be!"

"Grace is ten!" Steve thundered the three words. He continued in a more normal tone: "Do you really think she won't be hurt by her own mother sending her half a world away like so much unwanted baggage?"

Rachel shook her head vigorously. "No! It wouldn't be like that! It would be an adventure for her!"

Steve leaned forward, his arms on either side of Rachel's head now and his face mere inches from Rachel's as he snarled at her, "It won't matter what your intentions are. She will not understand, and she will be hurt by it."

Rachel opened her mouth to protest again, but Steve beat her. "Trust me. I know."

She would have protested again, except the shutters on Steve's eyes flickered for a minute and she caught a glimpse of agony in them. It made her shut her mouth again abruptly.

"Now, you will forget this nonsense about sending Gracie away. I do not want to hear _**one more word**_ about this, ever." Steve's voice got so low that even from three inches away, it was hard to hear him and his eyes had hardened into glacial ice again. "Stan is not the only one on this island who has plenty of friends. And if so much as a _**rumor**_ hits my ears that you are continuing to _**destroy**_ Danny and Grace's lives like this, so help me, one way or another, I will _**make sure**_ that Danny is the only one with custody rights for Grace."

Rachel would have been less frightened if he'd yelled. Or slammed things around. This intense stillness, the quiet threat of violence carefully controlled- it was more terrifying by far. Add in the facts that he had full immunity, which according to Danny meant that he pretty much did whatever he wanted- hanging people off of roofs and throwing them in shark cages included- and was trained in how to kill people, and that one crack Danny had made about him knowing exactly where all the best places to dump a body on the island were, and the fear was nearly enough to make Rachel pee her pants.

She didn't realize that Steve had moved away from her, or that she'd been staring rather blankly at him for several minutes (even though he'd turned to look out the window) until he asked, "Do you understand me?"

She answered shakily, "Yes."

Steve didn't even bother to look at her again on his way out.


	4. Aftermath

_**And back, once again, by popular request... **_

_**but don't expect any more out of this fic, because I'm out of ideas.**_

_**Happy reading! And thank you again to all of my reviewers.**_

**Quiet: The Aftermath**

Steve came back into the office, walking along as though nothing was out of the ordinary.

Danny crossed his arms and tilted his head as he looked at Steve. "Do I need to go help clean up a mess before my daughter gets home from school?"

"Nope." Steve stuck his hands in his pockets and rocked back on his heels. "All Rachel and I did was talk briefly. We were able to come to an understanding quickly."

Danny raised an eyebrow. "Is this the normal version of talking, or is this the SuperSEAL McGarrett way of talking, which involves holding onto someone's legs while you dangle them headfirst off of a building?"

Steve put a hand over his heart. "Danno, you wound me!" The look on his face gave away that he wasn't kidding about the next few words he said, though: "I wouldn't ever hurt Rachel, Danny, because you still love her, and hurting her hurts you and Grace. But putting a little bit of the fear of God in her... that I can do. Threatening to pull strings with the justice department so that _her_ custody rights are revoked... I can do that, too."

"You threatened to have her custody rights revoked?" Danno was shocked.

"Yeah, and I know the judge who would do it, too. Anybody willing to ship their kids thousands of miles away on their own is no fit parent in his eyes..."

"You know this how?"

"He was the only person other than me who argued with my father about sending Mary and I to the mainland. I remember his demeanor when he came over that day- all thunder and lava- boiling mad and louder than a rockslide." Steve closed his eyes for a minute at the memory. "He sure could yell. Mary and I could hear him all the way down on the beach."

Danny sighed. _Why does everything Steve is passionate about always come back to his own broken childhood?_

_His childhood... _Danny closed his eyes and rubbed between his eyes. _That's why he reacted so strongly. He knows how it would be for Grace. to be sent away from her only family, just like he was..._

"Thanks, partner," he said quietly.

"Nothing to thank me for, Danno. That's just what family does. We watch each others' backs." He grinned. "Besides, I love Gracie now, too. Your daughter's kicked down the doors and taken up residence in my heart, whether I normally like kids or not. I couldn't let that happen to her."

- H50 - H50 - H50 - H50 - H50 -

"Daddy!" Grace screamed when her father picked her up the next day. "Mommy said I don't have to go away to school!"

Tears popped into Danno's eyes as he hugged his darling little girl. "I know, honey."

"Are you the one who talked her out of it?"

"Well, I tried, but I think it was the your Uncle Steve's argument that tipped the scales in our favor," Danny replied honestly.

"Then we need to thank him! Can we bring him ice cream? And pizza? I can't wait to tell him thank you for convincing Mommy not to send me away where I'd never get to see you again or go surfing or swimming or anything fun!"

"Sure, Monkey, if you think we should treat Steve to pizza and ice cream, we can do that." Looking at Rachel as he took his daughter's hand, Danny was shocked to see tears.

"Hey, Gracie, can you go on out to the car and give your mom and I a chance to talk for a few minutes?"

Looking between her two parents, Grace nodded. "Okay, Danno."

As the door shut behind her, Danny took a step closer to Rachel. "What is it? What's the matter, Rachel?"

Rachel stared at the floor as she replied, her hands twisting, even as Danny stepped forward to lay a hand on her shoulder. "It's nothing... just what she said... about me _sending her away_... it's exactly what McGarrett said, when he was here. That she wouldn't understand, she wouldn't see it as an adventure, and it would just hurt her." Rachel looked up at Danny. "How could he know? He didn't even see her, talk to her about it, did he? I only told her about it on Monday..." Rachel broke off, sobbing, and Danny took her in his arms and rubbed her back. Just as he was about to explain, Rachel started talking again.

"Am I really that bad of a parent, that a complete stranger knows my child better than I do? How could he know? He doesn't even have kids!"

"No, but he loves Grace. And in this case, he knew what she would be going through."

Rachel pulled back to look Danny in the eyes. "What?"

"When he was a kid- after his mom got murdered- his father sent Steve and his sister to the mainland. Mary went to live with their grandmother. Steve went to military school. And that was pretty much the last time he saw either of them for years. When Mary was here, he said that he'd only seen her a handful of times in the last fifteen years."

"Oh, oh that's why... that's why..." Rachel choked out. She swallowed and continued, "When he was talking to me... mostly he was just scary... but for a few seconds, it was like a door opened in his eyes, and they were filled with pain... no, not pain, agony... and I couldn't figure it out; I'd almost convinced myself that I imagined it, because the rest of his expression never changed, it was just stony, and mad... His lips were pressed together that they looked as thin as a pair of popsicle sticks, and even his nostrils seemed pinched in. He was talking so quietly... it was scary, Danny, how quiet he got, because it just made me think if he wanted to, he could kill me just that quietly, and no one would ever know, the maid wouldn't even hear. He was so controlled... I could tell he pissed off, and that perfect control just made it even more scary.

"But the pain... I never expected that. And it makes sense, then, if he feels that he was hurt by his experience, that he wouldn't want that for Grace."

Rachel looked deep into her ex-husband's eyes. "And I swear, I swear to you, Daniel, I wasn't doing it to hurt you. And I would never, never hurt Grace on purpose. I just wanted to give her every possible opportunity, every advantage I could."

"Okay, babe, I understand. But you've got to remember, some of the best things in life can't be bought. Money doesn't buy happiness, and no matter how good that school is, it could never be good enough to make up for tearing her away from her family."


End file.
